health

[Amie]

So, eh, around the beginning of January, I began to exercise five nights a week. For the first two weeks, I worked out for 20 minutes, for the next two weeks, I worked out for an hour. In February, I worked out at two-three nights per week - for an hour.

I had alittle more energy, but didn't experience any notable changes.

Februaryish I had also begun to get out after dinner with the kids. We jumped on the trampoline, played hide-and-seek, or went walking.

My son was inspired and decided to set aside time in the evening to exercise. He and I began riding bikes three weeks ago (I still have playtime with my daugher too). The first week, we were doing a mile and a half every night, by the next week he had inspired me to double that length AND he wants to ride to Corpus Christi (like 184 miles!!!) in the future for charity (they do it annually for spina bifida).

The goal is great - don't know if we'll ever reach it - but it's a nice goal :).

Anyhow, the tables turned from his being inspired by me, to my being inspired by him. He assured me that the pain would stop if I just pushed through it. He said that it would "numb out". I laughed at first, but not for long after realizing that he was serious! He plays football and said that's how it works when they are conditioning.

I tried it, and he was right! He wrecked Sunday night - took a bad spill. He is a river of "road rash" (scrapes and bruises) and has one HUGE one on his knee. He has been out for a few days, but he still walks with his sister and I.

I've pushed to four miles now (in 25 minutes I might add ;)).

Guess what? It still hurts! I come home and fall out flat (literally) to have my nightly "heart attack" (cool down). My husband turns the ceiling fan up and gives me my space, lol!

Not only does it still hurt, I've just lost ONE inch in my waist! I definately feel less, umm, jiggly and I'm not giving up.

My son will be back in the saddle by next week I expect.

After I started playing with the kiddos after dinner, I wanted smaller dinners too, lol!

So, I've also been buying those new "100 calorie" packs for snack stuff, and more veggies (to my children's dismay) and fruit. We've switched from white to wheat bread (or semi-wheat), from regular to baked chips (though Doritos come in the portioned to 100 calorie packs now!).. stuff like that.

Rather than going on a diet, we've changed our life-style. This weekend we hope to go horseback riding. If the stables are closed we'll go for a hike.

This has been a slow moving transformation for us for some time - starting waaay back in '93 when I switched to Canola oil (it actually fights cholesterol) and stopped cooking the veggies that they did like in butter and salt. (But geez, I was skinny back then!!)

So, there's my health report of sorts, lol! "Less jiggly - still sore". How are y'all doin'?

Amie

[Paige]

Good job, Amie! Exercise is so important, and I think in the not too distant future you will not be having those "heart attacks" nearly so bad ;)

We are doing well. Dave recently was tested for cholesterol and the news was not good. A few years back he brought his cholesterol down almost a hundred points just w/diet, exercise, and natural supplements. However, he got off the regime and relaxed a bit way too much; so it went right back up to the dangerously high level it was. This has spurred him on to get way more faithful on all fronts. We walk together as much as the weather allows right now (4 miles at a brisk pace), and when the weather is bad I nordic track here at home and he goes to the gym at the police station and works out there.

Many of the things he now avoids diet-wise are the same things I avoid to keep my gall bladder functioning properly, so we keep each other on track. I'm happy to report that since my last attack in the fall, I've been doing quite well. I think the regime I'm on is working :)

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Hi,
We are really wanting to change our life style. My husband has been heavy his entire life. We just did 2 weeks of Seattle Sutton for him, but he just can't take it. I have a certificate in nutrition that I did by correspondence. I know what to do. Just not feeling well this year to stick with it.
But this week, I did really well with our meals. I make all his breakfast muffins. I use the Natural ovens Bagels. Use Boca Breakfast sausage and Fat free cheese and egg beaters. He loves them. I have been making these for a year. I freeze a bunch up every two weeks. They are only 300 calories and 4 grams a fat. A McDonald's Egg muffins is a lot more.
Tonight I made Turkey Meatloaf, with ground turkey breast. It was delicious. Instead of making a large loaf I made mini ones and put them in a 12 cup cup cake tin and we each had two with instant mashed potatoes and Brussels sprouts. The entire meal was under 400 calories and really filling. I am trying to use more spices to give things a little more zip.
With my Fibrio, I can walk in the summer which I love, but in the winter I can't, so we did get me a really nice treadmill. Its hard to do 30-40 minutes at a time, so now I am doing 15 minutes 3 times a day. My husband works out at the health club in town. So we are trying. When we retire, we won't be able to afford all the medicine he is on.
Anyway, keep up the good work. I have a splurge once a week. I have lost 44 pounds (eating bagels at bagel church) in the past 14 months. Its slow, but I am not starving.
Blessings,
Nancy:biggrinbounce:

[Amie]

44 pounds!! Wow! Note to self: bagels are good :).


Instead of making a large loaf I made mini ones and put them in a 12 cup cup cake tin and we each had two with instant mashed potatoes and Brussels sprouts. The entire meal was under 400 calories and really filling.

What a great idea! One of my family's largest problems is our LOVE for food. We still enjoy it, but are cutting down on portions (And eating more slowly to savor it). I'm going to use your suggestion!

I have also been buying dessert. Everyone looks forward to the sweet at the end of the day, rather than craving it alllll day. I allow the children to pick out our choices with one rule - a portion must be 100 calories or less.

They're really getting into eating healthy and participating in picking out even meals, but this is the most fun for them, ha. They are learning a lot. Before long, I think that they'll be able to list by heart which desserts they can eat the most of for the least calories, lol!


..I think in the not too distant future you will not be having those "heart attacks" nearly so bad

I sure hope so! Maybe it's the extra weight that I'm carrying that is making this so difficult to begin with! I want this as bad as I wanted to quit smoking and I've never gone back. My biggest obstacle will be what to do when the weather is cold or rainy.

I'm glad to hear that you're doing well and that they caught Dave's cholesteral. That can become a big problem! Is it ever a struggle for you to stick with that regime? Or is it too early to say?

Amie

[Paige]

Is it ever a struggle for you to stick with that regime? Or is it too early to say?

Yes, it is a struggle sometimes. Sometimes I really crave chocolate, so I have had some. When I do, I make it in small amounts. According to the books I've read, the worst thing I can do is have fried foods or really fatty meals. I am not a big fan of fast food, and I've always eaten a low-fat type diet, so that hasn't been a big loss to give those things up.

The exercise part for me is the easiest because I've been an exercise addict all my life! From what I've studied, the more you make it a routine part of your life, the more you will start to crave it and feel bad on the days you can't do it, so just keep doing what you're doing because you're probably almost there. Once those endorphins kick in, you'll feel great!

Paige

[Lauri]

Amie,
Hi I may have a solution to your problem:

My biggest obstacle will be what to do when the weather is cold or rainy.
As you know it's cold and snowy here more months out of the year that not. We have an exercise bike in the basement I got when I blew out my knee and I used it pretty regularly until this winter when we started using electric heaters upstairs to heat the house instead of the oil heater which was too expensive. The result being downstairs is like a freezer so I quit going down there to ride my bike. So we needed to find another way to get some exercise. We began about 5 weeks ago walking the mall. We walk all the way around the perimeter down all the little arms etc. We have a little mall, it's .8 miles all the way around the perimeter and we walk two laps. I really enjoy it, there's lots to look at with all the people and things going on so it really goes by quick and you don't notice your exercising so much. Andy and I carry a water bottle and when we are done stop in the food court and have our drink and relax. I may even keep doing it in the summer it will be nice and air conditioned in there. You probably have some big ass malls in Texas you could walk and get lots of exercise. :biggrinbounce:

Lauri

[backtothefuture]

I so love to talk about food!
This is the first time in my life that the weight has come off and stayed for now. I gave up fat free accept for salad dressing and eat whatever I want. I stay around 1400-1500 calories. When I get the days when I have to eat I do and have found the next day I can go right back to eating sensible. So I do believe I have finally learned when I am hungry and when I am not.
I keep tons of measuring half cups and cups and measuring teaspoons and tablespoons on my counter. And a big calculate from the dollar store that my nieces gave me and add up everything I eat. Also use the 100 calorie packets.
My treat every day is either 33 good and plenty which I eat 5 at a time and spread it out. Or three frozen small mint patties. 150 calories and 3 grams of fat. We also mix a lot of sugar free puddings with fruit. This week, I took butterscotch and didn't add the milk but mixed it with half a container of cool whip and Mixed it with a small can of crushed pineapple in its own juice and then added two chopped apples in. It was great. A little dollop of cool whip on the top. You can also fill ice cream cones with sugar free pudding. Add a few mini marshmallows for the kids.
Anyway, its a life time thing. Don't beat your self up when you slip. I am off to bagel church for my pumpernickel bagel with the cream cheese on the side. I only use a tablespoon on each half of my bagel. Also, I have a small fruit cup.
Have a good and healthy day
Nancy

[Amie]

OMG did y'all see that?!! :eek: Lauri cussed!! GASP! (hahaha Lauri..)


Once those endorphins kick in, you'll feel great!

Come ooonnn endorphins!


Sometimes I really crave chocolate, so I have had some.

Didn't Ed point out that chocolate is actually a vegetable at one time? I was convinced.:cool:


As you know it's cold and snowy here more months out of the year that not.

Why do you keep rubbing that in? That and I have to deal with all of these sunny days and warm weather! ;):biglaugha:


You probably have some big ass malls in Texas you could walk and get lots of exercise.

I appreciate the suggestion, but I'm not sure that they would offer me the type of hardcore work my jiggles need, lol. I am going to try finding some harder exercise tapes first.

You and Andy seem so alert and energetic in person! Did y'all exercise like that before we met as well?


I so love to talk about food!

Kewell!

I am off to bagel church for my pumpernickel bagel with the cream cheese on the side. I only use a tablespoon on each half of my bagel.

Out here the grocery stores sell flavored cream cheese spreads. I LOVE the sour cream and chive flavor on a bagel! :rolleyes:

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Aime,
When you change the way you look at things, the things you loot at, change.
Those were the kinds of words that helped me over a year ago, look at food in a totally different light. I knew I ate a lot for comfort. Or when I was sad or happy, you name it, food filled the void.
Now I look at food as nourishment for my soul, and some good stuff that God gave us to eat. I don't obsess about it anymore. Once I had the light bulb moment that I wasn't doing this anymore (stuffing myself with food) things did begin to change.
With my Fibro, at first I could only walk around the block. Now, Actually when i am done here, I am walking up to the Library to see my daughter. Its a 50 degree day here in Chicago.
When its cold I walk the treadmill or I go to target after bagel church and push a cart around the outside isles of the store twice. They probably think I am a nut case!
Nancy

[Lauri]

OMG did y'all see that?!! Lauri cussed!! GASP!

That wasn't cussing I thought I was talking Texan, isn't that the way y'all talk? lol


Didn't Ed point out that chocolate is actually a vegetable

Haven't you heard that dark chocolate is good for you. It has natural antioxidants and all kinds of good stuff. I have my stash that I munch on every night while sitting in front of the TV. How's that for healthy?


appreciate the suggestion, but I'm not sure that they would offer me the type of hardcore work my jiggles need

You could always strap on some weights to your arms and wrists and walk really fast.


You and Andy seem so alert and energetic in person! Did y'all exercise like that before we met as well?


No we are pretty much the sterotype couch potatoe TV watchers. Our daughter is the exercise police and she is always on us to exercise more so we usually finally get enough guilt to get us off our butts and get moving again.

Lauri

[Paige]

About the chocolate, I totally agree that it is rich w/antioxidants. My only problem is that for people with gall bladder troubles, it can trigger an attack. If I didn't have this dang slow digestive system that likes to create stones in my gb, I'd be eating chocolate everyday :D

[Amie]

I held back this comment because I didn't want it to overshadow the "mad at God" thread :). The past few times I went riding, I pushed it to 4.5 miles. (The distance around our neighborhood is 1.5 miles - we do 3 laps)


I knew I ate a lot for comfort. Or when I was sad or happy, you name it, food filled the void.

That's me too. It worked that way for me my whole life. Even admist a horribly disfunctional family, we could all bond around a good plate of food! I quit smoking I can't remember how long ago now. I'm thinking that it is 4 years this March. After that, food was a larger part of my life.

I am finding that when I am tempted to eat, I am generally bored or anxious. "Affirmations" do a lot in those situations - along with having y'all to talk to :).


Once I had the light bulb moment that I wasn't doing this anymore (stuffing myself with food) things did begin to change.

Isn't it strange how it comes in a frank decission like that? I have finally submissed to the feelings that I had been avoiding through eating and am working on them.


You could always strap on some weights to your arms and wrists and walk really fast.

You mean other than the ones I strapped to them by overeating? hahaha! I call the one that hangs under my arm when I hold it up my "spare bicep", lol!
That really is a good idea though, I hadn't thought of it.

I forgot about the benefits of dark chocolate too! My hubby's family is chalked full of heart disease so he went into for early testing (for prevention stuff). He was fine and has probably escaped the genetic curse, but the heart specialist encouraged him and everyone to eat dark chocolate. He said that it's really good for the heart. I didn't know about the antioxidants, that's really good to know!


If I didn't have this dang slow digestive system...

Now I'm confused. How can you have such a high metabolism with your slow digestive system?

:) Amie

[Paige]

Now I'm confused. How can you have such a high metabolism with your slow digestive system?

Darned if I know...I read up a whole bunch on the theory as to why thin women get gall stones because that is not typical. The theory is a slow digestive system. This somehow rang true to me because most people who eat a high carbohydrate breakfast get really hungry really soon. On the other hand, I could eat waffles at 7 a.m. and not feel hungry again until 3 p.m. Go figure. The only explanation I can come up with is I do have a slow digestive system.

Also I really identify with eating out of boredom. I find I do the same thing, and being involved with some activity really helps me. That includes writing and posting here on this site!!! :)

Paige

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Food is such a blessings in some ways isn't it and yet a curse. I still do over do it when I am going down, but I recognize it now and its been easier to get back on track. Not beat myself up and try again the next day.
Food is where everyone and anyone congregates it seems. Sometimes my husband likes to go to this big mega church in our area with a huge and I mean huge food court. Try walking past the carrot bake and German chocolate cake and every kind of food available to man!!
In fact the church I attended 30 years ago was known as church of the open refrigerator!! Hows that for a place of worship.
Paige, I was wondering why you don't have your gallbladder out. Mine came out 22 years ago. Much easier surgery now then when I had it.
I tried adding some easy things to my daily life plan, which isn't much when you are on disability. But where I go to bagel Church there is also a Cubs food and Target. So I part in the middle on the better days and walk to them all. I dance around the kitchen when in there, listening to my music and I have 1 pound weights that I add when I walk on my treadmill. Also, I found that doing 30 minutes at a time was to hard on my hips, so now I do the treadmill 3 times a day for 10 minutes. You would be surprised how easy it is to find 10 minutes here and there over a 30 -45 minutes chunk.
Tonight we are having a splurge and going for corn beef and cabbage since its st. Paddy's day. Its the only time of year we eat it. I just ironed my green shirt to ware to bagel church. (not a stitch of Irish in me)
Have a good day all.
Nancy

[Paige]

Paige, I was wondering why you don't have your gallbladder out. Mine came out 22 years ago. Much easier surgery now then when I had it.

I'm stubborn, really. I had to have my spleen removed about 19 yrs. ago. After doing some research and listening to my mom (an RN) and mom-in-law, I decided to just change some dietary things around and take some supplements to see if I can avoid the surgery. So far, it has worked. If things go south in the future, I may have to have the surgery, but if I can avoid it I'm going to.

Paige

[Lauri]

Paige,
If it meant I couldn't eat dark chocolate any more I'd have my gall bladder ripped out in a heart beat. I'm only just sorta kidding, I'm ruled by my dark master the chocolate. :D

Lauri

[Amie]

So eh, we're still riding our 4 miles per day. I feel little to no difference in my clothes, but I am beginning to see more changes. Muscles and dents are becoming more visible and are replacing the jiggly stuff. I wonder why I'm not going down though - or maybe it is so gradual that it doesn't seem that way. Oh well - I'm gonna keep on keepin' on :)

How are y'alls endeavors going?

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Good job Amie:)
Life changes are hard. I blew it yesterday with a ton of candy. Just knowing my daughter was feeling better, I guess I celebrated. But back on track today.
Would any of you here know anything about Cholesterol medicine? When my husband takes his, he is like a different person. Its terrible. We just can't figure out what is going on.
Nancy

[Infinite Grace]

Ladies,
Let me be the first man to jump on this health wagon. I started today limiting my intake of food. I am going to try my darnedest to only take in between 2,000 and 2,500 calories a day. I'd like your help in keeping me accountable. Feel free to ask me how I am doing.

IF I seem to be ignoring you, chase me down via PM or e-mail. Don't let me off the hook.

Two things: when I have more difficulty getting up from a chair than my elderly clients, there's something wrong. Two, I told one of my group members "you know what to do, just do it," I realized that I was talking to myself about my weight. I've studied for years about how to lose weight, why to lose weight, etc. Kind of like theology - for years I studied theology, only recently did I start to implement the REAL stuff. So, I want to walk the walk. I want to drop 100 pounds in the next year (I am currently over 300 lbs.). My picture is in my Profile for any who wants to see how big I am (although it is only a "head shot" you can tell by my triple chins that I'm a big boy).

thanks for listening,

[Paige]

You go, Ed! I will definitely be cheering you on as you head for your goal! :cheerleader02:

Also, If I hear of any good tips for keeping that full feeling on a limited number of calories, I'll pass them on. (Drink a ton of water!) Mostly, its about retraining ourselves just to eat when we are hungry as Nancy has shared already.

Nancy,

My mom has taken several kinds of cholesterol med. She is experiencing extreme muscle and joint pain with them. She told me just this morning that she is cutting her pills in half now, just so she can try and cope with the pain. (Her Dr. is unaware that she is doing this.) We have heard that lipitor and the meds out there like it have the potential to wipe out a liver. My husband is taking some natural supps, watching his diet, and exercising. His number 2 mos. ago was slightly over 300 (gasp!). In another month he's going to check it again, and I'll let you know the results. I know that last time he followed this regiment, he dropped almost 100 points in about 1 year.

I'd definitely tell your Dr. (if you haven't already) what is going on with your husband.

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Hi,
My husband went off his medicine for a few days and is so much better again. I did look up side effects of statins and depression and muscle and joint pain and liver damage are some. Mostly he needs the weight off. We had gotten 25 pounds off and then with his job going down, he is eating and eating. I make most of his meals, but he cheats. Ed, if you cheat I am coming after you. I am the nutrition person in the family and when I go to all the work to fix the right stuff and then they cheat, it gets me ticked. (well just a little maybe)
Its hard work Ed. My husband has been heavy his entire life. He is now 260 again. High blood pressure, diabetic and now high cholesterol. I read a book once that said, just start with one thing different a day. Maybe start with Breakfast and make it a little healthier. Than try a walk just around the block. Nothing to overwhelming. Mostly its portion control. If you can't control it don't eat it. That is my motto. I do have my chocolate splurge once in a while, but get right back on track the next day. My husband is on 2000 calories a day and does loose weight on that. . Certain foods do trigger you to eat more and more.
Anyway, I will be right behind you, cheering you on!!
Thanks all
Nancy

[Amie]

Welcome aboard Ed!!


I'd like your help in keeping me accountable.

Oh, I don't know... I'm sort of timid - buh wahahahahaha!!

One thing that helped me to quit smoking was to not quit the habit, but to replace the habit with a healthier one. Truthfully, it has been harder to do the same with the eating. I give myself affirmations "It's okay to feel hungry". It may sound strange, but it helps me.


Also, If I hear of any good tips for keeping that full feeling on a limited number of calories, I'll pass them on. (Drink a ton of water!)

Water really does help A LOT. I also have 4oz of milk when the hunger panges hit at night - if I'm up.

Know what I learned today all?! A bag of cotton candy is only 100 calories and has less sugar than a can of Coke!! Wow!


Would any of you here know anything about Cholesterol medicine? When my husband takes his, he is like a different person. Its terrible. We just can't figure out what is going on.

I agree with Paige, call the doc! In the least you may be able to switch meds and see if the mood swings are related to it. It could also be some other issue, ya know?


Than try a walk just around the block. Nothing to overwhelming.

Walking is an excellent way to get fit. The good news is that with any situation, the more overweight we are, the more calories burned during exercise.

There have been a couple of shows on TV (I think one is called "National Body Challenge") that are about families who either compete with other families for who can loose the most weight - or just challenge themselves in general. I learned a lot from them. (for one, you can have like 12 corn tortillas to every 1 homemade one).

I also learned a lot from this: http://www.dietpower.com/. You can download it for a free trial and learn a great deal in the 30 days. You keep a food and activity diary and the program works everything out on charts. I learned that my family was eating mostly fat and carbohydrate. Our vegetable/fruit section on the pie chart was teeny.

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi all,
What is really interesting is to see how long you have to walk to burn the calories you have eaten. For example. Some times I allow my self 2 frozen mint patties a day. Well, I walk slow and it takes me 30 minutes to burn off 75 calories. One mint Pattie is 55. So I have to walk almost 45 minutes on my treadmill for those two treats. When you start connecting that, you kind of start thinking a little different in the food you choose. Just an interesting tid-bit.
Nancy

[Paige]

Yeah, that has been one of my tricks too. Since I was a teenager, I've always counted calories (I have this math idiosyncrisy, lol). I've made it a life-long goal to try and expend everything I take in on a daily basis. It makes for a very good maintenance plan! :)

Paige

[Infinite Grace]

Nancy,
One of the things about exercise though is that it isn't just about the calories that you burn while doing it, you actually burn more calories at other times as well.

exercise is definitely a big thing. I used to walk about a mile and a half a day, but since doing the full-time school thing, in addition to the full-time work thing, there isn't much time to think about exercise or eating right.

I am not certain how well the 2,000 calories is going to work for me. I am on the road way too much. However, today I stood in line at Wendy's for 15 minutes, planning on getting a salad (Chicken Mandarin), but alas, my break was only 15 minutes long, and so I got food I could eat while driving - a Single, fries, and diet lemonade. Now some here may say, "bad boy," but when you realize that I would normally have had a Double or Triple, biggie sized, you see that portion control may be the way to go for me.

One more thing: recent research has shown that weight is not lost in fat free situations. Yes, trans fat is a problem for health, but Americans right now are not consuming enough fats thanks to all the B.S. that floats around out there. This research ties in with what the Mayo Clinic claimed over a decade ago.

I think that exercise, portion control, and minimizing simple carbs is a good way to drop poundage. Fruits, raw veggies, high fiber/low glycemic carbs, fresh fruit, raw brocolli, cauliflower, bell peppers, carrots, etc. are excellent foods to fill up on. A reasonable portion of protein as well - peanut butter, or eggs are the best. Finally, dairy products have been shown to help us lose weight. I prefer sugar-free yogurt.

Anyway, I am not doing superbly yet, but I am doing. Less food will eventually at least mean no weight gain. Hopefully as my body adjusts, and I begin to exercise, I will see weight loss. If I can get to 200 lbs, I think I'll be okay.

[Paige]

I think that exercise, portion control, and minimizing simple carbs is a good way to drop poundage. Fruits, raw veggies, high fiber/low glycemic carbs, fresh fruit, raw brocolli, cauliflower, bell peppers, carrots, etc. are excellent foods to fill up on. A reasonable portion of protein as well - peanut butter, or eggs are the best. Finally, dairy products have been shown to help us lose weight. I prefer sugar-free yogurt.


I'm with you there. Also, if you want some good fat, throw in an avocado once in a while. Ed, Dave and I use a sprouted grain bread that is very low glycemic. You might have heard of it already. It is called Ezekiel bread and the recipe is based on the same one Ezekiel used in the bible. We both like it a lot.

Paige

[Amie]

Anyway, I am not doing superbly yet, but I am doing.

If you ask me, any doing is superb! How successful would anyone be cutting down to rice cakes anyway?

An order of large fries (not super-sized) at McDonald's is 520 calories. There are a couple of killer sandwiches, like my favorite "Big n Tasty". We sometimes buy the sandwiches, and cook some tots or fries in the oven at home (I spray no-stick canola oil on them to make them crunchy). That's not a grab and go though, heh.

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Ed,
You made a good choice today!! You have to start somewhere. I am at home now not working, so it is easier for me to plan my meals and skip breakfast, which I know you are not suppose to do and go right to lunch.
Tonight we had a meatless meal with extra vegetables. We are trying at least 2 times a week to do that.
Some nights though, we just have to take that slider run to white castle!!
Blessings,
Nancy

[Amie]

So I went to the doctor today about an unrelated thing but asked WHY the scale just read that I only lost 2 pounds (!!!).

I thought y'all might want to hear her answer. She said that at first, the body tends to build muscle first, especially when the chosen exercise works said muscles. Muscle weighs more than fat (I'm sure y'all already know that one) so it won't show in the scale. After the muscles build for a bit, they begin to aid in metabolizing fat. She said that if I keep it up, very soon I should be dropping a pound a week.

The fact that I can see my triceps again, feel my hamstrings, and am in general exchanging a lot of the jiggly stuff for less jiggly stuff must mean I'm in the building stage just like she said.

I'm looking forward to the next stage, lol.

I'm stressing over Easter though! The "Easter bunny" (my children know who "he" is) usually brings a huge, solid chocolate bunny to everyone (I thought switching to hollow and getting him taller would fool the eye into believing that it has more), a couple of bags of malted milk balls and chocolate eggs (split between us), starburst jelly beans (oh, one bag each of those - except for me, I'm not a jelly beaner), one row of peeps each, a chocolate covered peanut butter egg each, a cadbury egg each, and some bubble gum eggs in a little egg carton thingy.

That's just the candy, that doesn't include the brisket etc we usually cook out and all of the boiled eggs.

Holidays for us - as with many of us - means FOOD! The kids get a toy of some sort each, or we get Six Flags passes or something, but it is really food-centered.

My hubby and I were talking about buying more "stocking filler" type stuff and less candy. I just don't know which candy I could drop, I mean, the malted milk balls? the cadbury egg? mmmm...:homer2: chocolate.

This is gonna be a tough one. What will y'all be doing? (Btw, I'm soooo glad to have y'all to talk to about this!)

Amie

[Amie]

And btw,

Wanna hear something strange? I was brushing my hair and noticed my elbows (the weight loss). Then I felt a jolt of fear. Isn't that weird? I am having a hard time nailing down exactly why..

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi Amie,
Good job on the 2 pounds:clap2: It is true that you build muscle first. I have not dropped a pound since August but have gone done another 2 clothes size.
I was a 2 extra large last year at this time and I am now a medium. Even though technically my BMI fat thing, is still higher than it should be. 20 years ago I was horrified at being at this weight, now I am so thankful to be at least able to be at this weight!! Age and time changes how important numbers are. I don't even weigh myself. Only at the doctor.

As far as the candy for Easter. My kids stopped wanting so much years ago. So, because they are older and the Easter Bunny should have taken a hike a long time ago,but hasn't', I give them a card with $ and one small thing. My daughter wanted the new Pride and Prejudice movie so I got her that. She won't eat candy, so i get her some sugar free gum. My son I just get one big chocolate bunny and same deal with the card and gift.

I have found personally that the Hershey's chocolate marshmallow eggs, 100 calories and only 5 grams of fat. 6 in a package, does it for me. I allow myself one a day for 6 days!!

As far as the elbow and weight loss, don't know what to think about that yet:)
Good job.
Nancy

[Lauri]

Amie,
When Jen was little we used to buy the little plastic easter eggs and fill them with little toys and trinkets instead of candy. She loved finding each one and opening them to find a new treasure inside. Now that she is older and watching her weight she doesn't want candy so I fill her basket with CD's, DVD's etc. and maybe one small thing of candy. Good job on the new muscles and elbow location. Hang in there and don't let the holiday distract you, I'm pulling for you!:thumbsup2:

Lauri

[Jotham]

Some of you here [that know me from NJM] followed my crazy immune system break down in 2004 that sent me to specialist after specialist all trying to put Humpty Dumpty back together.

...Well I'M BACK...

Drs. say i've got the metabolism and health of a college kid and i feel pretty much that way too (Just had my 48th last Turkey day).

Someone had the question/comment on how one might be able to have a high metabolism yet have a slow digestive system? That was part of the situation with me.

I'm a blood type A. And unbenonst to me, A'ers typicaly have very low levels of digestive enzymes. Once they figured this out and i began taking hydrocloric acid suplements with each meal my liver function began to get back to normal...it was so bad they belived it only a mater of time before liver failure! And this was totaly due to my foods not properly digesting and clogging my liver with toxins.

On calories? Well, uh, i only eat about 1100 to maybe 1300 calories a day. Many years ago a dr. had me on a 2000 calorie diet and it almost killed me. My digestive system just shut down. I went into erythmia (heart palpitations) and all sorts of crazy stuff. He then put me on a 1200 calorie diet which he was very concerned as he believed this to be just above starvation levels for most americans. To his suprise my health turned around within days of cutting my calories.

Now i don't do any of this to loose weight/size...cuz i'm still the 130lbs i was in college track days. I do it because it is a scientific fact that by consuming only 70% of the American RDA of foods labratory rats lived 50% longer lives than those who ate 100%, and the group who consumed 130% the RDA lived only 50% of the normal life span of a healthy lab rat.

...So there you go. the rats have my vote.

On excersise? Amie: The trampoline is probably the healthiest form of excersise on the planet!!!! I'm on my rebound air mini trampoline (http://www.ultimate-rebound.com/) for about 40 minutes each morning. It is the best way to get the lymphatic system pumping...the up/down movement of the body moves the fluids through the valves in the lymphatic system as it has no pump like the heart for blood in veins. And it sooooooo makes me feel like a happy rebelious kid jumping on my bed in my younger years.

Fun stuff,
Thom

[Amie]

On excersise? Amie: The trampoline is probably the healthiest form of excersise on the planet!!!! I'm on my rebound air mini trampoline for about 40 minutes each morning. It is the best way to get the lymphatic system pumping...the up/down movement of the body moves the fluids through the valves in the lymphatic system as it has no pump like the heart for blood in veins. And it sooooooo makes me feel like a happy rebelious kid jumping on my bed in my younger years.

It's really great to have you around again mi amigo! Before or after I bike with my son (Mike), I most of the time spend outside quality time with my daughter (Amanda) as well (sometimes she is busy with friends - and sometimes the friends join us). We play hide-n-seek, we hunt bugs, we ride bikes, etc. We have a trampoline in the back yard - one of those 15 footers like this one (http://www.outdoortoysdirect.co.uk/images/products/plum/trampolines.jpg).

Tangent: I do not recommend the "Jump King" brand if you're going to join the kids. We took one back because we went so close to the ground on the rebound and purchased one from our local sports supply store with a sturdy mat.

Am back: (haha) My husband (Bryan) is insane totally, because he does flips and stuff on it. I stick with the games that the kids made up. The favorite is "butt-feet" (lol). We have contests to see who can go from their feet to their butt and back again without stopping for the longest. I loose every time, hahaha! It's like the quote from "What Dreams May Come" though, "sometimes when you loose, you win".

I'm an "A" type myself and the info that you gave is good to know. I'm not sure whether Mike and Amanda are, but I wonder if that would have something to do with their liver enzymes being off (the doctors just watch them and concluded that it is normal for them - they aren't off enough to make them sick or endanger their lives). Interesting!

It's good to hear that you are back in the game again! Are you familiar with the story of the woman who washed Jesus's feet with tears and wiped them dry with her tears in Luke 7? There are just so many ways to apply such a story imo. She loved more, because she was forgiven more. Couldn't this also be applied in terms of health? Is life different after having made it through the suffering that you have endured?

Amie

[Amie]

I was a 2 extra large last year at this time and I am now a medium.

Wow! I look forward to mediums :).

Thank you to you and Lauri for the encouragement and support! (and suggestions!) I'm going to fill their baskets with more little toys than candy. I won't take away all of the candy at once so it doesn't feel like a punishment, but I will decrease it yearly.

Amie

Ps- Two more posts Nancy and you break 100! :)

[Amie]

I keep forgetting to say things, lol!

Paige, you were right! Though it still hurts to pedal up the hills, my body misses the rides now!

Amie

[Paige]

Told you so!!!! :banana: :banana: :banana:

[backtothefuture]

Hi all,
We had a gorgeous day here yesterday so I was able to walk to the library to see my daughter and walk home. Living in the Chicago suburbs makes for a long winter.
Does everyone here know their blood type. After reading the post on the liver enzymes, (very interesting) I thought, I don't even know that I am:confused:
So I guess this makes post 99 right:) I will have to really think about something special for my 100th;)
Nancy

[Paige]

I'm a type O negative. There has been a pretty good book out for a while called, "Eat Right For Your Type." I skimmed over it and found some pretty interesting things in it. (My mom-in-law follows it pretty religiously.) The premise is that we have different dietary needs according to whatever blood type we are. For example, as an O, I can eat a fair amount of red meat; but my husband being an A, should severely limit his red meat intake. (This makes my husband very unhappy, so he chooses to ignore it for the most part :( He might have a much lower cholesterol count if he would switch to a mostly vegetarian diet.)

All in all, I found the book interesting, but I also take everything with a grain of salt.

Paige

[Infinite Grace]

Hi,
Just checking in to let you know that the calories thing has not been as good as I had hoped. Too damn tough when I spend so many hours on the road a day (between traveling from one client to the next, then going so far for class so many nights a week).

Anyway, the upside of the message is that our local posh hotel has a workout room as well as an awesome indoor pool (cleanest pool in town they say - not the hotel, but everyone else in town). We joined their family membership club so that our whole family can swim and workout year round. It works out to only $8 a week for unlimited use. My wife and I are going to be going to the workout room at least 3X a week.

I want you to know though that I have cut my consumption of food down a lot. I am now noticing when I am full (that's a good thing). I figure cutting down, plus some good exercise (like I used to do before my ankle started bothering me) will help me to lose.

My goal is 2 lbs a week, for a total of 100 lbs. this year. If I don't make it, that's fine, but that's my goal. By Easter next year, 210 lbs. (hopefully). Pray for me.

[Paige]

Good job, Ed. Swimming will be an excellent thing to do, especially w/ troubling ankles. You are definitely traveling in the right direction, and that is what matters :clap2:

Paige

[Amie]

I want you to know though that I have cut my consumption of food down a lot. I am now noticing when I am full (that's a good thing).

I've been feeling fuller sooner, and am sometimes disappointed because I really love to eat. I refocus on the goal - which I love even more. I've also begun to relax about feeling hungry - and I've figured out that I had some baggage about that.

As a Mom, I was overly attentive with my children's hunger as well I think. I felt like I was failing if they were hungry for longer than the time it took to say "I'm hungry" and the time it took to make something. Since I am calmer, my calmness helps my children to be calm. I set up snack times for them to look forward to (and for me too!), and assure them in-between.

I watched a story about a woman who had weighed somewhere around 650lbs. She had her stomach stapled and recalled first feeling the discomfort and slight pain in her stomach. She said that her doctor explained to her that she was feeling hunger. She said that she knew that there were people in the world that had never felt full, while she (for at least 30 years of life) had never felt hunger. After she felt hunger, she learned that it was okay to feel hungry. Her story impacted me a lot.


Just checking in to let you know that the calories thing has not been as good as I had hoped.

The doc said that 500 calories less per day (whether burned or cut back) equals 1 pound lost per week. That sounds like a lot until you consider that a 16oz glass of koolaid has a little over 100 calories, and the same of Coke has 165 calories! In liquids alone a lot can be cut back.

I put smaller portions of food - I mean like a fourth of what I usually eat - on my plate at once. If I stop at the third plate, I've cut back. If I drink water, I've cut back. For what it's worth, I say start small and set easily obtainable goals. It's encouraging and it doesn't suck as bad (and starving sucks for me!).



All-

(Men read the italicized portion at your own risk)

I went to the doc for female issues initially and it turns out that my hormones are out of whack. They are part of the reason for my weight struggle. I think it's so funny though, that I'm a 35 year old Mom of two and am going on "the pill". I can't believe that I can't wait to get in for that visit (you girls know the one) so doc can see which pill is for me.

I feel as if I'm peeling off layers that I've buried myself under and am getting back to me again. It's scary and exciting. I am beginning to think that the scary part (the elbows ie) is not knowing why I buried myself here to begin with and maybe having to face that. It could be that I'm over whatever it was too. I'll see.

And Ed --> prayin' for you bro :)

Amie

[Jotham]

...There has been a pretty good book out for a while called, "Eat Right For Your Type."...
All in all, I found the book interesting, but I also take everything with a grain of salt.

Paige

Yup that's the book, and agree with your statement. It was actually recomended to me by a regular M.D. and also a naturepath dr. I do follow it nearly 100% and am fortunate to have married an A, and our two kids are A's ...so the only food we have in the cupboards are for A'ers! What a difference it has made. But the idea of putting Hydrocloric Acid in my body still chills me sometimes, but my system is sure up to speed now!

Thom

[Paige]

Thom,

I'm taking hydrochloric acid w/meals as well. Since doing so, along w/other supplements, I haven't had a full-blown gall bladder attack :) Hydrochloric acid sounds so bad, so most of the time I call it pepsin (sounds milder, lol).

I'm glad to hear you are feeling so much better. Dave's parents are both A's, like you all. I imagine it makes following the book's instructions much easier. It is a real challenge for me and Dave, on the other hand. :beathead:

Paige

[Amie]

I took my son in to the doc Thursday (last week) because his knee injury from the bike crash looked funny - it just wasn't healing like I have ever seen. It got a weird red color around it and was hard to the touch, and liquidy feeling all at once. I began to suspect a fracture.

X-rays were normal, but he has an infection in it (is taking antibiotics) and has to sit out of riding for two weeks. Much to his dismay, limits to his movement mean that about all he can do is read, watch tv, and play video games - lol! Anyone catch the sarchasm?

He weighed in a pound lighter. That may not be much to some, but from what I understand it's quite a feat for a growing child. He built muscle, grew an inch taller, and lost a pound! He accomplished all of that with very little exercise. Two weeks after his crash, he pulled a groin muscle in PE which we've been watching (and resting) for a week - all the more reason for me to bring him in.

I weighed in three pounds lighter than before (for a total of 5 pounds). I lost more than one pound that week and I suspect that I have begun to loose much more quickly than expected.

Since I'm not on a "diet", and just changed the way I eat, this should be a permanent change. It's still alittle scary, but I don't care - I'm doing it anyway!

Amie

[Donone]

Boy, are we obsessed. Me too, I told you I read alot, I have read about 100 diet and nutrition books in the last five years, I could lecture on nutrition. Problem, nothing quite works for a long enough time to get the gut around my middle. I am a relapser, chronic.

I have always been active and a big eater, and perfectly healthy, I thought, until silent and undetected I began to be diabetic, my arteries clogged and I had a mild heart attack, resulting in three stints. That was five years ago, I walk, work out two to three times a week, try to eat right, have developed lots of muscle, but still have a stubborn belly fat issue, Very frustrating, my wife has pictures from my lifeguard beach body years and has never seen me at goal weight.

The diabetes is a real daily drag, a simple bowl of heatthy cereal send me into the sugar strastoshpere, a slow and late digestive system causes morning highs that make me feel sticky and sluggish, and the lows after taking the medications often bring the need for quick candy bar fixes or I get jittery and faint.

Still feel wonderful and fearfully made, still not expecting more than the 70-80 years the Psalmist promised.

Don

[Paige]

Don,

I read recently (you may have too) that the only thing that gets to the stubborn belly fat is prolonged cardio (running, walking, hiking etc...). By prolonged, it seems to point to longer than 30 minute intervals and more like 5 times per week.

Here is something else I heard from a fitness and nutrition "expert". If one had to make a choice between diet OR exercise, there are far more benefits to be had with exercise alone than diet alone.

My dad has Type 1 diabetes (diagnosed since his early 30's). He does quite better with a protein breakfast to start off his day. Are you good to go w/eggs? With the heart condition, have they told you to stay off them? I've heard recently that eggs are not the villians (cholesterol-wise) they once were thought to be. Moderation would still be the key.

Paige

[Infinite Grace]

Paige,
Eggs and Peanut butter are the two best forms of Protein on the planet. NO trans fat, no carbs. Pure protein.

[backtothefuture]

Ed, you are corect about the eggs and peanut butter. I had a nice big bagel with penut butter and jelly for dinner tonight.:biggrinbounce: I also had a doctor appointment this past monday and was 5 pounds lighter than when I was there in September. So that was nice.
How are you doing with the diet Ed?
Nancy

[Infinite Grace]

Well, ummmm...uhhhh...mmm...I am not sure. While I have cut down on my eating portions, I am still struggling with some aspects of my diet itself. I don't know how else to explain it...

Exercise, now that's another matter. This week has sucked, since our hotel/pool/workout room has closed for their annual maintenance. However, other activities are in the works. Truth be told, the pool and workout room re-opens next Thursday. It is my plan to go there at least 5 days a week (twice with the family to swim). The rest of the time will probably be a short workout on the life-cycle, followed by a bit of swimming.

Diet though? Not going well. I really need to think through this whole thing and decide which diet will work best for me. And as we have discussed before, it is better to exercise only than diet only...

[backtothefuture]

Ed,
One of the best advice I ever got from my doctor was one element at a time. When it comes to diet or as they like to say, life changes now, it does not happen over night. Myself for one, hates to exercise but am pretty good about knowing what I should and shouldn't eat. Once I learned when my hunger was true hunger and the food was not just replacing an emotional moment, things began to turn for me.
It was like a light bulb moment. I still blow it, but not nearly as much.
So maybe you should give yourself permission to maybe just concentrate on the exercise part at first. Since your family will be joining in that with you. Try that for a month, or how ever long it takes. Then start maybe looking at just one meal a week you can work on. I know with your schedule its hard. But (I don't mean this in a critical way) that is no excuse:o
We eat out at fast food places 4 times a week probably. Taco Bell, McDonald's, Quisno's, the hot dog joint. We just make better choices or less to eat. All those places have nutrition available on the web. For a long time, i gave my husband a sheet that he kept in his wallet. This way he got to get out of work for a break and he knew the better choices to make. Now he doesn't need the list. We always have apples and grapes and bananas in the house. Those little snack packs of 100 calories are great also.
Anyway, (you did want to be held accountable;)
I admire you for having the courage to at least share your weight struggles like so many of us.
Hang in there.
Nancy

[Amie]

Ed,

If I were your coach, this would be my response:

Things that are more difficult to access will be more difficult to stay commited to doing. Swimming is wonderful and when you can do it, I encourage it. However, walking is something you may be able to step out of your front door and do. The good news is that the bigger you are, the more calories you burn doing it. You may burn 300-400 calories in a 30 minute walk. More good news is that the more you burn off, the faster you can walk, and the more you maintain the calories being burned. Eventually you will "plateau", BUT, you can turn up the heat then by putting weights on your ankles, or including some weight training.

To loose 1 pound a week, you need to cut calories by 500 per day. Considering that a 12 oz can of soda is 150 calories, and what you pick up at the drive through is commonly at least 16 oz, you may be able to meet that first goal (of 500 calories cut) just by switching to water. From there, you can build slowly and decrease calories more.

Eating stimulates the pleasure center in the brain, which releases dopamine. Science has been finding that those of us who immensely enjoy eating (and I say "us" because I'm one of them) may have dopamine deficiencies. Exercise though, increases not only dopamine, but dopamine receptors. If you slowly increase exercise, and slowly decrease calories, they will trade with little (not no) feelings of withdrawal.

And that's what I would recommend if I were coach.

If this is something you don't feel ready for, I could relate totally - but with my smoking more so. I struggled and quit smoking many times before I finally beat it, and each try built me up mentally for the next try.

My issues with loosing weight, I'm learning, are quite different and are probably in your field. After the whole elbow scare, and some thinking, I realized that I had been hiding behind my weight so that the fellas don't guak. The strange thing is, that it's only the fellas that I don't know, or know of, doing it that I was hiding from (so strangers). I feel all yucky and just want to hit them! I'm not going to let that slow me down, I intend to allow myself to finally feel those feelings and work through them. It is freakin' hard though, lemme tell ya!

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Amie,
Great post. I am so proud of you also.:clap2: Many of us have hidden behind our weight. I never realized that until this year.
Now I realize that part of my underlying pain, was thinking God was not here with me. Since I was going through so much and still am. But I came back to here:biggrinbounce: And decided not to be wishy washy anymore about my belief now in God and his grace and mercy and his fulfilled plan. When I got to that place, Most of my anger, disappointment, Depression, you name it was replaced with grace.
Oh, I love you guys!!
Blessings,
Nancy

[Amie]

Oh, I love you guys!!

The feeling is mutual sis! Your presence strengthens me :)

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Just letting you all know that I am planning a splurge tomorrow!! Since I am having dinner here for 17 people, I decided after all that work, enjoy the good food.
God Bless to you all.
Nancy

[Amie]

I have been sticking to the new style of eating pretty much. By pretty much I mean that I have gone to the pizza buffet once per month, and we ate some chipped BBQ sandwiches and fries on Easter (okay, and the candy).

So far I'm still maintaining a slow and steady drop in weight.

My son is healed up, but I think is testing his independence. He is choosing not to go with me, and looking at me as if he were waiting for me to force him to go. He is loosing weight via our new way of eating, and says that he still wants to go biking. I'm going to allow him to do it in his own time so this choice is his. Anything that he accomplishes from it will be because he did it - not Mommy making him.

I'm pretty sure we walked our candy off on Easter though. The bunny brought us Six Flags season passes and we headed out there thinking no one would be there on Easter. I guess other people thought the same thing, lol! It wasn't too crowded especially in the AM. We had a good time and got some sun in the process.

I can't wait until the waterpark opens!

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Oh Amie,
I am so proud of you and how you are working on a new lifestyle. Its hard to do, but can be done. I had my Easter splurge and was down a pound today for my Dr. appointment. I have walked 2 times a day all week. Just because the weather is so wonderful and the colors of the tree's and flowers. I just love it.
Since I am on a high living fully awake in the presence of God today I was just so thankful, that it doesn't matter if we are short or tall, or skinny or overweight. God loves us just how we are. I didn't always know that.
Last night I went with my daughter to a support group for Gluten free living. It was so cool. People of all ages. Some older that me who have just been diagnosed. Sometimes we laughed so hard, I thought we would burst at what everyone else had to say. One man about my age (55) said he was in torture. He had to be dairy and wheat free like my daughter. He just wanted to know if Gin was gluten free, which it is!! So we knew where he was going after the meeting:biggrinbounce:
Blessings,
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

I'm just so happy for you that my heart is filled to bursting and I absolutely mean that! I was thinking of you today while I was listening (again) to Doug King's presentation "The Transformed Heart" (here: http://www.presence.tv/cms/transmillennial2004_m1_doug_king.php). If you have time while you're cleaning or something (that's what I do), I think you may enjoy it.

This week - I found my collar bones again!!

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi Amie,
Thanks for the link, but it won't open. Can I search for it over at Presence? Or send the link to my home e-mail if you can.
I need to listen to it today. I am a little melancholy and in lots of pain, so I have to keep reminding myself that I am fully awake, walking in the full presence of God, face to face.
I think instead of a pray and walk today, i will take a cry and walk. That usually makes me feel a little better!
Blessings
Nancy

[Paige]

Here is an update on my hubby's progress:

In 3 mos., he has brought his cholesterol numbers down from 304 to 230. His bad cholesterol went down from 257 to 186. His good cholesterol only went down 3 points. His triglycerides and blood sugar levels came down as well.

He is going to keep doing what he is doing, as this needs to be a lifestyle change for him. I'm pretty happy with a 74 pt. drop w/o using prescription drugs!

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Gosh Paige that is wonderful for your husband. Can you share how you are doing it. My husband is diabetic, 60 pounds over weight, having a breakdown with work, so its hard to control his emotional eating. His cholesterol is also bad. I had him on flax for a while, but it hasn't helped. Any suggestions, would be appreciated.
Nancy

[Paige]

We found a product put out by "Young Again Nutrients" called "Healthy Cholesterol". Right now they are also offering a free bottle of grapefruit pectin to go with 2 bottles of healthy cholesterol. Dave took both of those products faithfully for the last 3 mos. He also takes flax seed oil (which we will probably switch to salmon oil when this bottle is up) and garlic. He has recently begun taking a therepuetic (sp?) level of vit. C every day (1,000 mg's).

He never used to eat breakfast, which wasn't a problem when he was young, but it started to mess with his blood sugar levels as he got older. Now, he faithfully eats oatmeal every a.m. Also, he tries to make sure that he doesn't take in more than 200 mg's of cholesterol in his diet daily. He began exercising regularly (although for the past 3 weeks, he has been so busy he skipped). Today, he started back walking with me for 4 miles.

The ingredients in "Healthy Cholesterol" are:

phytosterols, beta glucan, cayenne herb powder, garlic extract, niccinamide, policosanol, chromium picolinate.

The website for young again nutrients is:

www.youngagain.com

If you go there, you can read all the info on the products they offer, and the studies they have available.

Paige

[Amie]

Good news about hubby Paige!! That's wonderful!

My son stopped riding all together for a while. He is very into the new way of eating though. So far he has lost 5 pounds! That's excellent for a boy who's still growing. He did bike with me last night - I think he's excited about his progress.

Amie

[Paige]

Thats great that he is taking to the new eating plan you adopted. That means that half the battle is already won!

I have a pretty good tofu recipe if you are looking for something new to try...

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Thanks Paige for the info. I have had my husband on the flax for a long time, but I think because of his diabetes, its just not working.
We just came back from a 2 day get away. The word healthy eating wasn't even in our vocabulary. We had a free complimentary breakfast buffet like I have never seen in my life!
But tomorrow, we start again.

Amie, good news on your son also!!

Nancy

[Amie]

So far...

It's been 3 months and 12 pounds down! I hope to add an ab workout routine to the now 6 miles, 5 days a week that I am doing, next week. It has proven to work for me in the past, just wonderin' if I'm mentally ready for it, lol!

Mike was so encouraged by the progress before, that he has been riding with me again. I'm so glad that I didn't make him. He can be proud of his own accomplishment and the choice that he made.

His school pics came in; we get 'em every year. When we were putting the new one in the frame, he was able to see his progress.. and I mean SEE!! My hubby and I were shocked ourselves at the difference! I guess that it's been so gradual that we haven't noticed that much. His weight loss is probably around where I'm at, but he has been putting on muscle and growing (puberty) on top of it all. His body fat is MUCH lower, wow.

I sometimes watch a tv show called "Honey We're Killing the Kids". When I imagine the future for my children had we not made these changes - well it's not an active or healthy one. They are always eating tofu on that show. I've never had it and am somewhat chicken to taste it. Anyone had it before?

How are y'all doing???

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi,
I had a melt down and ate an entire bag of dark chocolate miniature chocolate this week. Have not done that in 2 years!! I know it was emotional eating! It was good while it lasted. I thought i was beyond that, but obviously not!
I also, found out, out of 59 symptoms for Fibromyalgia and related other symptoms, I have 54 of them!! Kind of explains why I feel the way I do though. I could be worse, so glad I am where I am at with it!!
But have been good the rest of the week so far. I cooked a chicken in the crock pot over night last night. Then this morning pulled it all off the bones. Nice and tender. I made chicken barbecue pizza tonight. It was really good.
Great job you are doing Amie!
Nancy

[Paige]

Amie,

Tofu is basically flavorless. It takes on the flavor of whatever you put it in. I just made a tofu recipe tonight. Everyone in our family likes it, but our 16 yr. old (she doesn't like the consistency of tofu, but it has nothing to do with the flavor). It is called, "Thai Pineapple-Peanut Fried Rice". If you want the recipe, let me know.

As for how I'm doing...I need to be more conscientious about taking my supplements regularly and on time. When I get busy, I forget about them.

Paige

[Amie]

Nancy,

Well at least dark chocolate is good for the heart! I had to look up "Fibromyalgia" (found this: http://fmaware.org/fminfo/brochure.htm). That sounds painful! How are you dealing with the symptoms? Does knowing where it's all coming from help?

I am SO going to make some chicken like you described!! When I want to rush chipped beef or pork BBQ, I cook it in the crock pot like that, chip it up, mix it with BBQ sauce, and then smoke it for a bit on the grill. The best way of course, is just to smoke it, but that's not always practical. I don't know why I never thought of doing chicken like that!!

Paige,

I would like the recipe - is it inexpensive enough so it won't break the bank if no one likes it?

I'm taking 3 pills a day presently, and a liquid. I have been beginning to feel nauseated from feeling the pills go down. Usually milk helps me, but one of the pills can't be taken with dairy.

What time are you sposed to take your pills? Could the time be an issue?

All (the guys may not be interested),

This exercise is eventually going to balance out my hormones so I won't have to be on "the pill" forever. As for the girl troubles, there's help for me and other women going through what I am! I'm probably going to have a procedure called "Novasure" (http://www.novasure.com/).

Having it done guarantees that I won't have more children. Get this -- my tubes are tied, if I even tried to carry again I would be bed ridden, yet I'm still coming to terms with the finality of this procedure!! Am I nuts?!

Basically, Novasure delivers a precisely measured electrical charge, removing the endometrial lining. The uterus never produces that padding for a baby again. 85% of women never menstrate again, some have minimal bleeding, while a very slim few go back to where they were.

The side effects are a little scary, and the pain isn't an attractive notion. On the other hand, living with what I do now is no walk in the park.

Amie

[Paige]

Amie,

I have no excuse for forgetting, because I'm supposed to take my pills with meals. I think my problem is I'm always in a hurry, and that means I go on to the next activity before I've finished the one I'm doing. My bad!

Recipe:
1/2 C. teriyaki sauce
16 oz. (or as close to it as you can find) extra firm tofu (pressed to drain excess liquid and then cubed)
2 Tblsp. peanut oil
2 red or green bell peppers, cut into strips
1 C. green onions, chopped
4 C. cooked and chilled rice (2 C. dry)
16 oz. pineapple tidbits
1 C. peanuts
2 tsp. dried basil

1. Pour teriyaki sauce over tofu and let marinate at least 10 min. in refrig.
2. Heat oil in wok, add marinated tofu (drain off and reserve sauce). Cook till golden brown. Remove tofu from wok and put back in sauce (add a few flakes of red pepper if you like it spicier).
3. Add bell peppers to wok and stir fry for approx 2 min. (until it starts to get tender). Add green onions and stir fry another minute or so.
4. Add rice and pineapple (with juice). Stir fry till heated through.
5. Add tofu and sauce back in, then peanuts and basil. Continue stir frying until heated through.

Let everyone season to taste with soy sauce on their own. Hope you like it!

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Hi,
Amie, I have found cooking my meat in the crock pot over night is a real time saver for me. Especially with Fibomyalgia, the fatigue is tremendous. So I do that a lot.
Then I pick all the chicken off the bones. Yesterday, I had two pizza shells found in the cheese area of the store. I spread barbecue sauce, black olives, 3 strips of lean cooked bacon, topped with lots of cooked chicken and lower fat mozzarella cheese. You can add mushrooms, sometime I add artichokes, onions, spinach., just about anything. Its not greasy and tastes really pretty good.
Sometimes also with the chicken, I then mix it in with cooked Spanish rice. You can get those Uncle Ben's that take 90 seconds in the microwave. Then add ad some fruit on the side.
But you can cook a pot roast over night and make tacos or burritos the next day really easy. I have even made soup over night and just re-heated it the next day.
The Fibro is very painful. Usually antidepressants are a normal coarse of treatment because they help raise your pain tolerance, but I have an allergic reaction to them all and can't take them. My Dr. does not give pain medicine for Fibro. I can understand, because it can get addicting. But I do suffer a lot.
I try to walk everyday that I can.
I really need to be in the water. But, and here is a no fun story for the girls. I was in menopause for 18 years. What a nightmare on top of the fibro. 3 years ago I came down with something called vaginal atrophy. Look that one up. Talk about painful. I had been on the hormone patch for 14 years but went off of it 4 years ago. At age 36 I had no estrogen. Anyway, the vaginal atrophy led to 14 bladder infections that led to 14 yeast infections. I am only now able to sit for a while anyway.
But I can't go in the water, because of the chlorine. But I feel better in the water. Like doing water exercises. Its easier on my joints.
Mostly I just suffer.
I also, get these electric jolts. Its like someone has a voodoo doll and is stabbing me. I have actually dropped casseroles in the kitchen. Usually I just start screaming. But I only just read yesterday that those kinds of shocks are because of oxygen loss. I have a curve in my back, so I am thinking of trying some kind of meditation or deep breathing exercises to see if that helps.
Anyway, thanks for the link. That is one I have never been to.
Even the constant ringing in my ears, they say is the Fibro.
Blessings,
And good luck with your program.
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

"The Work" is a process discovered by "Byron Katie". Basically, we all act on thoughts that may not even be true. I'm not suggesting that she offers some new thoughts for everyone to replace the old ones with, she enables us to get a better grip on our own.

It's really hard to describe in a paragraph. If you will, read this: http://www.womenbeyond.com/thework.htm.

By no means am I suggesting you do "The Work" - though it's a great tool in my experience. The point in my wanting you to understand what it is, is so you'll know what's going on in this audio clip that I would very much like you to hear. I would love to get your thoughts on it. It's titled "Samples of The Work from Santa Fe" here: http://www.thework.com/MoreClips.asp#Audio. If you get the time :).

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Thanks Amie,
I put the links in my favorite places for tomorrow. Its almost 11 at night here Chicago time and still 80 out. Our house is so hot. But we are off to bed for the night.
You know, I read one of Byron Katie's books last year that I think you or some one else recommended. But I wasn't ready for it. I can get them pretty easy with my daughter being a librarian and the inter library loan we have in town.
I need something to help me break being so cynical about everything.I was just sitting up in my big rocking chair in my office just a few minutes ago. I was thinking about when I had false hope at least I was not this negative and cynical about so many things. Was that a better place to be in. I wonder some times. ignorance is bliss they say!
Thanks again.
Will get back to you tomorrow and let you know what I think.
Have a nice Sunday.
Nancy

[backtothefuture]

Hi Amie,
I just wanted you to know that I did read the first link. I did have her book over a year ago and was not ready for it. But I think I am now.
I can relate some to whare she is coming from. My problem is that at times I do feel what I feel is real because of so many things in my life.
But I do think I have had a few windows of light this year. The first being that one of the issues that came to light was Abandonment. After years of counseling this word was never even in the vocabulary. So I was not aware this was triggering a lot of the un-true stuff I was believing. So that was a first big step for me. That was like my first step to wards coming out of the wilderness. After that was revealed to me ( I think one of those God things) I have at least wanted to go forward.
The second was just this week. My husband has had a terrible year with his job. He can get sarcastic and on many days just come home and go to sleep. Well, I was taking it personal. Making myself nuts. Then one day last week, I asked my self, what was bothering me really about this. In the begging I thought it was abandonment. But I worked that through and realized that wasn't it. He tells me 2 times a day he loves me, does a lot for me. What I connected, was my dad for one is a very sarcastic man. Even at 86. When we were kids, he would come right home from work, grab the tv controller right out of our kids hands without asking and then go to sleep on the couch. Never asked about our day, how we were, things like that. SO that was another light bulb moment for me. I was able to take that anger that was building in my relationship, put it in the right place and instead, this week, try to be a little more understanding and I have made the connection that its not about me when these feeling come.
Anyway, Don't know if I am making any sense. I will read through the rest of the links later and order the book through the library.
Thanks Amie:biggrinbounce:
Nancy

[Amie]

I can relate some to whare she is coming from. My problem is that at times I do feel what I feel is real because of so many things in my life.

Inquiring on our thoughts, doesn't mean that they aren't real. It doesn't mean that it's untrue in every circumstance either. Sometimes the thought is true, and what it means to us is the story. For example, it's true I haven't done the dishes yet. I used to think that means I was failing as a Mom. After "The Work", I realized that's just not true.

"The Work" at first can also make things feel like it's all our fault. Thoughts really do come out of no where, we aren't to blame for them. We aren't to blame, our thinking is.

I can relate to what you said about your hubby. Mine used to just go to bed when he got upset (when we were in an arguement). I had A LOT of thoughts/stories about it and they all boiled down to my own issues.
I'm glad you're already familiar with it. I was mostly interested in your thoughts on the second link :). I'm looking forward to it.

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi Amie,
I finished reading the other link. i settled down into my office where it is 87 degrees with fan and read it through.
I took 6 pages of notes. At first when the lady was giving her list, I was like, gee, that sounds like me. Physical and emotional pain, hearing ( I have ringing in my ears). She wanted to be healthy, peace of mind, eat anything not afraid of food and not to be alone. Wanted to stop whining and complaining, and wanted her depression and anxiety to go away. Not to be disappointed in herself and she was ticked about all this crap.
Then she talked about the physical, anxiety and depression all come at the same time, Like a party all at the same time. I could relate to that.
But after all of that she said she was a therapist and I have to tell you, no dis-respect but I laughed so hard. It felt so good to just laugh.

So I guess its time for me to do the work. I had the opportunity last year and threw the book down. I have a hard time journaling also. Seeing the pain on paper is so hard for me.
When the lady talking said the physical and emotional pain is true for her. That is how I feel. Katie says, the reality is people do suffer.
So I don't quite know yet how to tie in my physical pain and the reality of it. I do no that I am tired of my story. All year I have said that. So maybe it is time to move forward. I have sat up here in my office for 15 months for a reason.
Who would I be without my story of suffering? That is what I need to find out.
I feel kind of like I am in a vicious circle. I don't want the suffering, and yet if its reality, and by concentrating on it, it really brings up feelings of anger at God and me for not being able to handle it? Maybe thats where the lie is. But when I am in so much pain, its hard to think of this as just a life experience.
For me, the reality has been that the pain and suffering is the reality.
But I am not free with it, that is for sure.
So how do I detach from a story that is true?
I think I have been doing some inquiring this year. Thats how I came to see how abandonment played into my thinking. And to sort some of that truth from the lies.
Katie, says, what you need will appear. I would like that. I think that is whats happening even now.:)
I could relate also when the lady was talking about exercise. I just last week, made the connection. When I didn't exercise, I really beat myself up. Oh your such a looser. Pain pain pain is your life. Blah Blah Blah!! But I figured it out, that, that wasn't true. I couldn't exercise because the pain was telling my body it needed a rest.(Maybe like my body was telling me this week, I needed an entire bag of chocolate)
I do want the pain to stop. And yet, I thought I have been willing to experience it. But maybe I really haven't. Though I have complained some on this forum, I never tell anyone, how I am feeling. My entire family didn't even know I was on disability until just recently. I thought I was suffering in silence and yet, maybe I wasn't. Maybe I was being a martyr or something.
I do want my thinking to be healthy. So that is a positive.
Who would I be without the story. I really think that is the healing journey I have been on these past 2 years. I don't know. Or I do, but just haven't connected it yet. So that is something positive to look forward to. Finding out just what I am made of.
I do know that this last year, especially since September. I decided. No more counseling. I just couldn't tell my story any more. Not one more time. I needed to give up on what should be in my way of thinking and experience more of just what is. That kind of thinking can free me I think.
Thanks Amie. I guess I will get the book again and print out some of the work sheets.
I have felt for so long, its all my fault. I am willing to meet myself 50/ 50 on this distortion:eek:
Maybe I have believed a lie for so long, I can't see the truth, sitting right in front of me. But that's OK, cause I at least I can say that now.
My cynicism with God. Its my anger. I know that. But I know that he is OK with that. Maybe after doing the work, I won't feel that way.
This past year, my counselor left the practice, my Steven's minister left, my Church disbanded and my doctors left. The bible study I wanted got canceled and the church where I liked to go to a weight group, burned to the ground! At first I thought, what in the world did I do to end up with all this disappointment. But, where it left me, was in a place where I had to think my own questions, think my own answers and in the end, gave me the push to come out of the wilderness and want to stop telling the same, old story.

Thanks Amie.
You have been such a blessing and encouragement to me. Pray for me, as I walk in a new direction. One that I can understand and come out free and in peace.
Blessings
Nancy

[Amie]

But after all of that she said she was a therapist and I have to tell you, no dis-respect but I laughed so hard. It felt so good to just laugh.

I laughed too!!.. and so did she! One time Katie said something to the effect of "Isn't it beautiful that something which just a moment ago caused us such suffering, can make us laugh?" It really is something, isn't it?


So how do I detach from a story that is true?

Ever heard of the "red balloon experiment"? If you were placed in a room with a red balloon in it, and instructed NOT to think about it, you would think about it more than ever!

Katie said "I don't let go of my thoughts – I meet them with understanding. Then they let go of me."

I have found this to be true for me as well.

If The Work does you good, then I'm happy for you. If it doesn't, I won't judge you Nancy. I'm glad you liked the audio on that link. It put a lot of things in perspective for me. It is interesting how we all experience pain, but do not have to have pain and suffering.

I'm not perfect at The Work and haven't found it to be a cure. I don't think their is a cure. As Dr Phil says "life is managed, it is not cured". I've found it to be a management aid :).

You are in my prayers. I suspect that you have already found some of that illusive "peace", else such a statement couldn't be felt as: "My cynicism with God. Its my anger. I know that. But I know that he is OK with that." I could be wrong of course - just an observation.

Shalom,

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Thanks Amie,
I did enjoy the link. I also sent it to my daughter and hope she listens to it.
We are all so different and yet so alike in many ways.
In my own grief these past couple of years, its been a real eye opener for me not to judge someone else who is in grief. Some would say, get over it. And yet, it happens in time. Time is an important element.
My season now is for healing. I may not ever see or feel it physically or totally emotionally, but I do believe I can come to a place of peace about my life and for me that would be a good place.
I thought I could buy the book and if there is a work book or print out some of the work and take it to bagel church with me. Its a place where I can relax and have some privacy to write out what I need to write.

Blessings,
Nancy
ps My son brought me flowers tonight. Just because. He said, Mom I love you and appreciate all you do.:clap2:
How sweet is that for a 23 year old! (God moment!)

[backtothefuture]

Hi,
Any one here ever done Weight Watchers? I signed up this last week. I don"t really need to loose much but thought the support would be nice. I have been down with a bad sinus infection, so not really a good week to start on.
I can still have my bagel and cream cheese and fruit at Bagel church. Instead of counting it as 450 calories its 10 points for me. I thought maybe I could get some ideas for recipes for the family and help my husband also.
Nancy

[Amie]

How's it going for everybody? I haven't weighed in for a while. The conference threw me off (That's my story and I'm sticking to it! haha!). When I got back I was down a lap - I had gotten up to 4 (6 miles) and could ride them in a half an hour. My 'girl problem' acted up again and I was off the horse for 2 weeks!

Now I am 'dying' at 2 laps, and push through the third. I'm still working at it though!

For the winter I've decided to go with something like "Turbo Jam" or "Tae Bo" videos. I really want to crank it up and be very ready next swimming season. We shall see if it all works out, lol!

Since I wasn't riding, I ate alittle more. I'm happy to report though that it was still much less than I had been eating - I don't dare measure and become discouraged anytime in the near future, haha!

I still work through what this sort of 'unburying' means to me and the feelings that it invokes.

I hope things are going well for our little support group here :).

Amie

[davo]

Well I went and did the deed -- signed up for the gym as of about 6 weeks ago [well tell a lie, my good lady signed me up; talk about giving me the vote of confidence lol]. Well she scored an extra month's membership out of it for herself as well :). Anyway, I must say, busting my chops has been really good for me so I'll be sticking with it. :beathead:<< that's me exercising. :biglaugha:

[Paige]

Way to go, Davo!!! I predict that you will soon be addicted :)

Paige

[Amie]

Great news Davo :)

Welcome to hell.. buu wahahahahaha! (<--evil laugh). Whatcha doin'? Weight training? Swims? Changing your eating? Come on, give us the goods! ;)

All,

My largest challenge right now is patience. I really just want to be back to my old self right now. It takes a while to take it off "the healthy way". I intellectualize that it will stay off doing it that way, blah, blah, blah, but I don't feel that assurance in my heart.

I'm not quitting or anything, just needlessly stressing :).

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi Hi,
I have been wondering how everyone has been doing lately health wise. We have had so many graduation parties this summer. Hard to watch what you are eating at those kinds of gatherings.
Did have a long talk with the hubby. And he is going in next week for a physical. He is so stressed and needs to get back on the diabetic exchange diet. I can do it, but he has to want it.
Congrats Davo on the gym. We have a nice one by us with an indoor pool which would be great for my husband, but he is to embarrassed to go being so heavy. I think we missed a great business opportunity and should have opened up a gym for only overweight people. Seems Like no one wants to go to those places because of being to embarrassed. Shouldn't have to feel that way, but I know I always did also.
Hang in there everyone.
Nancy

[Amie]

Well we stopped riding. They redid the streets in the neighborhood and left them covered in this gravel stuff. We have to go so slow down the hill that our heart rate slows and it becomes pointless. I tried calling the street manager, and he was already defensive. I'm thinking that more than just me have called about this.

I took another baby step per my eating and walk. I have been loosing 3-4 pounds per month still. It is still strange feeling and seeing muscles and bones that were long buried - and it's also tough facing just how deeply they were under, heh.

The exercise part is still a challenge to keep up. I don't see myself ever returning to the way I used to eat. I ate constantly now that I look back - things like little debbies and doritos with picante sauce. If I ate something salty, I always had to follow it with something sweet.

I am "hypoglycemic" - my blood sugar levels don't always behave. I used to think that I had more episodes of the shakes and stuff because I was getting older, and now I see that it was because of my weight. I haven't had one in a while now - "knock on wood".

When I was in high school, I went through a bout of bulemia. It lasted for at least one school year. I can't describe the feeling that I would have when I just ate everything that I wanted. Afterward I would feel guilty and purge.

In PE they showed a movie about a girl with bulemia. After she "binged and purged" for so long, she got a hole in her throat. The stomach acids had eaten right through. That scared me, and I stopped purging.

Sheesh, I've never spoken publically about that before :). Now let's see if I can actually muster the gumption to push "post reply".

After I quit smoking about four years ago, I began to eat again in my free time. I would say that it was two springs ago when I began to feel that old feeling of elation by eating. It was like I was still bulemic, even though I wasn't purging.

My "wake-up call" was at the Transmillennial '05 conference. Some people were going hiking and I wanted to go with. I wanted to hang out with them and get to take in some awesome scenery. It wasn't long before I began feeling my heartbeat in my throat and my lungs were somewhere down by my feet.

I made it half way. It SUCKED!! I wanted to go all the way! I wasn't really mad and disappointed about my size, I was really ticked off about my inability.

It took some months of mental preparation before I began this quest, but here I am. I don't know that I could make it all the way up that trail, but I'm beginning to feel good about what I'm becoming.

It's not about looks. MAN I used to argue with folks when they said that concerning eating disorders. I was SURE that it was about looks. I see now, at least for me, that it wasn't/isn't.

It was/is about the difference between longing for and chasing happiness by eating, and finding and holding happiness basically through personal power. I didn't want to face that - that I felt powerless.

Slowly "Amie" is getting unburied. Not just physically. It's tough, but I'm glad for it - and I'm tougher ;)

Thanks for listening,

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi Amie,
Thanks so much for sharing. I had my light bulb moment 2 years ago this December with food. My husband was talking Christmas night at the AA meeting here in town. But before he talked this woman got up and shared her story. How so much of it had involved food and with her, anorexia. I just somehow made a decision right then and there, to stop comforting my self with food.
I still slip up now and then, but have found it really easy to get back up the next day and try again. I have lost most of the guilt and shame that I use to associate with the stuffing myself. Then hating myself circle.
Our daughter has struggled these past 3 years with a partial anorexia thing. She went from 130 pounds to 71, 3 years ago. I just thought I would die with grief and worry. She has gradually worked her way up to a healthy weight, but suffers so with a self image and food is still such a burden for her. Partly because she has also been diagnosed with celiac which is gluten and lactose intolerance. So she gets really frustrated.
We had a talk up here in my office last week. She was in her really, I hate myself mood. She told me, she never has a good day anymore. I asked her if that was true. She said yes. I said, no its wasn't. She had only told me 4 days earlier that she had a good day and didn't over eat and sleep all night. So then she said. OK, so I had one good day out of 575 days. So I said, well, that was at least one good day and not never. Anyway, she just kind of looked stumped. Then she said She is a big fat pig. I said, is that true? She said yes. I said, no it isn't. You are in a size extra small. Does that look like a size for a big fat pig. Well anyway, you get the picture. Eventually she ended with. She was up all night eating and crying. I said and what does that do for you. She said, makes her mad and angry at her self. I said thats right. You need to not be so hard on yourself and let it go and try again tomorrow. I said, its up to her to make the choice to eat during the night or not. You are going to cry anyway, so try crying without eating!! She was like, that is your advice for me, to cry, but don't eat.:rolleyes: Anyway, she left with a smile and had a better night.
I am proud of you Amie:biggrinbounce: You have shared your heart and some difficult things. I love that you keep going, you keep trying. You inspire me!!
Blessings
Nancy:D

[Paige]

Here, here, Amie! I'm so proud of your progress and discipline to keep at it. I'm imagining that you are starting to look like a stick figure ( 3-4 lbs. a month for many months!!!), so be careful!

Nancy, it sounds like you were really able to help bring some equilibrium to your daughter. I hope she holds onto that. Proper self-image is so very important to all of us. I remember quite vividly my teenage years and how I thought I could never be skinny enough. Those aren't fond memories.

Paige

[Amie]

I'm hardly a stick figure Paige, lol! When you saw me I was in twice the clothing size than what is normal for me. I think that I carry the extra weight fairly well, so it's not as obvious.

Nancy I so connected to the words of your daughter. I know how it feels to be absolutely disguisted with my body. I wonder how many other people do, and just never actually say it. It looks like you understood on some level too since you knew the result of a self-beating so well.

The reality for me was (and still is sometimes) that my body reminded me of what I saw as my own weaknesses. I took my pain out on it. I also thought that if it could be perfect, that there would be nothing to be mad at. That just wasn't a reality, which left me feeling helpless and hopeless - which would make me mad at my body again, the cycle going on and on. I guess that's the confused thinking of someone with an eating disorder.

Like I said before, I quit smoking about four years ago. There's really no chance of my going back. I still get cravings, but they stink so bad that I don't want to go near them to do anything about it anyway. I replaced the habit with chewing gum. I chew the "ice" flavor because I can feel the cool going down my throat. I didn't smoke menthal, but I could still feel the smoke, ya know? Anyhow, I think that I can honestly say that I'm still a physical addict to nicotine - else I wouldn't crave it. The cravings are not unbearable because I am not longer psychologically addicted.

I wonder if it is going to be the same with eating - where eventually I won't want it, even amidst the stirrings. I already have a different response to the inner dialogue that comes naturally (for now) which calls for anger at my body, and seeks pleasure in food (via the body). Maybe one day that old thinking will completely let go of me, like it has with smoking.

Amie

Btw- Thank you for your support and encouragement, it's priceless :)

[backtothefuture]

Amie,
The food issues can be so complicated. I use to (and maybe still) pride myself that I didn't drink or smoke or do drugs blah blah blah:biggrinbounce:
But as I looked though family videos last week, I was fat, fat, fat forever. Food was my drug of choice. Sometimes, I still slip up. The advantage is one Twinkie won't cause me to overdose or drive drunk:uhh: So I still have to ask myself, when I stuff myself whats it all about.
Its still about feelings, that are buried at times, the anger, that I just don't want to let go of and much more.
When I saw the eating disorder that my daughter grabbed on to, I was just devastated. But I knew deep in my heart, that I hated myself as much as she did. I just couldn't understand how she could, being so cute and smart and coming from a mom who just loved her to death and affirmed her in everything.
As I began to heal and come more into fulfillment and what that means, my guilt and shame has started to gradually come down. That has helped me to stay calm with my daughter and try to talk to her now honestly and from an entire different angle. And to see my part in her sickness. I use to blame myself for it all. But I don't anymore.
I am so glad now that even the media is jumping on the band wagon about models who are to skinny. It has sent such a wrong message to Girls and some boys.
Anyway, 3 years ago, I had know hope at all for my daughters healing or my own. I feel different most days now.
I am thankful for this place. Can't say that enough times:clap2:
We are all in this together, aren't we!!
Blessings
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

Do you ever watch "Celebrity Fit Club"? The doctor on there sells his diet to the public too. The other day he said "If you're going to cheat, go all the way!" haha! Yep, better a slice of cake to a couple of M&Ms. One will leave you longing for more, heh.. Okay well maybe both will? haha!

"And to see my part in her sickness." Wow! That takes some serious courage!!! Talk about inspiration! What prompted you to do that? How did/do you take it?


I remember quite vividly my teenage years and how I thought I could never be skinny enough. Those aren't fond memories.

Where you heavy? Or you just felt that way?

Amie

[Paige]

I was not heavy, in fact I was always thin and gangly. However, I was very tall and my heighth made me feel "big". I felt that if I could whittle myself down to nothing, then I might get to be petite. It was strange thinking, but it made me obsessed about my weight for a lot of years. (I'm a bit less obsessed now.)

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Amie,
I think part of the grief I have been working through has been the part I played in my daughters sickness. Once I had the light bulb moment this year about my own abandonment issues and what that was for me, I have gradually had the courage to face my inner demons so to speak.

The part I played in her sickness I see now is how much I smothered her. You wouldn't think that was a bad thing, but I didn't give her space to make mistakes or make her own choices. What I did was out of Love I thought, but it turned out to be out of my own fear. I wanted my children to have a better life than what I thought I did.
She really still hasn't connected the dots about the eating disorder. She has been to tons of doctors, all kinds of medicine. But I call it what it is now. An eating disorder and she will take it from me. I was to afraid to tell her this a year ago. But seeing her healthy is more important now. I have written her and told her, I am very sorry for any pain I have caused her. She will say, I didn't cause her any pain, but I know I have. Not intentionally, but I have.

I also, didn't let her grow up. You saw the picture I sent you. She is 4 ft nine and her hands and ears and feet are about the size of a 12 year old. She will be 26 this January. I just felt one day, God spoke to me and said, Nancy, you have to see her as an adult. So I had to start letting her go and trust that God would see to her needs and have been praying for her now that she see all her fulfillment needs meant in God.
A few months ago, a friend of hers was taking them to the City (Chicago) for a country artist concert. It didn't even start until 11 at night. At first I thought, I would just die. The through of them even going into the city,makes me nuts. But she told me they were going, so I just said have a great time, and just had to let her go. So each day that goes by, I let go a little more.
You see Amie, I had nothing to hold on to but my kids for a long time I thought. My worth was tied up in being a mother. Once I started seeing the grace I have been extended and seeing myself starting to believe in myself, I was able to start loving from the inside and not from outside the gates where fear and abandonment ruled my life.
My kids are almost 26 and 24. They are great kids. I love them so much. But I have taken them as far as I can and I see its Gods turn to take over. I worry still about them, but I don't give them enough credit for being smart and capable kids.
Anyway, those are just a few area's that I know played a significant part in her sickness. Now I am dealing with her, from a broken heart, a fulfilled perspective and hope for the first time in a long time.
Blessings,
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

When I begin to feel that old twinge of guilt for screwing up as a Mom (and all of us do), or screwing up period, I remind myself "When you know better, you do better". It's so true I think. I mean, we may all know better on the surface, but it isn't until that light bulb clicks on that we really know better, would you say?

Your daughter looked absolutely beautiful in that picture. You have two good looking kids.

You're making a lot of big changes, aye? Maybe not really becoming stronger, but realizing that you have been all along? You're doing great.


Paige,

Gotcha. When did you begin to work through that?

Amie

[Paige]

Paige,

Gotcha. When did you begin to work through that?

Amie

Well after high school and in the earlier years of marriage. I realized I needed to accept who I am. I am a darn near 6 ft. woman. God made me that way. I'll never be shorter (unless I come down with osteoporosis :( ). Gradually, I stopped seeing myself as "big", and began to appreciate who I was created to be. I used to weigh myself twice a day for fear I might gain and ounce. Now, I can go for months without the desire to even get on a scale. I really go by how I feel, and how I feel in my clothes. Working out is more about how it makes me feel everyday when I do it. The endorphins help keep me more relaxed, and I have a greater sense of well being.

Paige

[jlv]

Paige,

My wife's best friend from high-school always says she's 5 foot 12. I would have sworn she's 6 foot.

Most of those super-models are taller than that. If extreme height didn't make them even more beautiful, they wouldn't be on the runway.

And being tall means you intimidated the little boys. Though most 16-year-old girls can't understand what I just said, evenentially they will and they will realize it's a good thing.

JL

[Paige]

LOL, I had a friend in high school who was also tall like me, and that is what she wrote in the year book right before we graduated..."We're not 6 ft., we're 5' 12"!"

Something that I found very wierd in my growing years was that the boys who were nicer to me happened to be those shorter than me. The taller boys wouldn't hardly speak to me. Go figure...

I'm just thankful that my husband has never been intimidated by my height. I'm an inch and a half taller than him, and it makes not the slightest difference.

[Amie]

Well,

I've stayed the course and am still loosing about 3-4 pounds every month. I've gone from a 16-18 to a 10-11, and from an XL shirt to a medium. Truthfully, I still don't see much difference. I can feel parts of my neck that I haven't in a long time, and see muscles moving that I haven't in a long time, and some things seemed to have moved - IE my belly button is higher, lol!

I gave myself permission to eat whatever I wanted on Halloween prior to it. I probably put on a pound (not kidding at all) because it turned out to be like when I tried to quit smoking.. if I thought "just one cigerette", I would blow the whole thing and have to try to quit again later. I completely fell off the wagon and found myself unable to stop walking back to the candy bowl for chocolate. There was plenty so that my children had lots of chocolate too. They had been robbing the stuff that we were passing out as well (I did resist that). However, I feel guilty because they could have also had the candy that I ate. All of the chocolate is gone so the binge is over, but like I said, I'm still dealing with the guilt.

I don't buy anything for at home that would 'set me off'. I just don't put myself in that position and it has been working. Thanksgiving is coming and I will just limit what I make. It won't be as hard as Halloween. I love pumpkin pie, but it is not a Hershey bar, a Reese's, or a Butterfinger :).

The real challenge this season will be Christmas. I'm so grateful for my friends here, and just your listening.

You may or may not have heard but Kirstie Alley has been conquering her weight. She's having a "big reveal" on Oprah where she is actually going to wear a bikini on international TV! Talk about guts! She has a bit of an edge in that she can pay personal trainers and afford the Jenny Craig stuff. I say more power to her though! I hope that after she looses it, that she has beaten it. You know, Carnie Wilson still has her struggles. The Oprah with Kirstie Alley is supposed to be on Monday by the way if you want to watch or tape it.

Amie

[Amie]

I just remembered too -

Did anyone see the Halloween Jenny Craig commericial with Kirstie Alley? That one struck me as a bit off color. She "boogie-booed" kids because she decided to give them her candy. I dunno, it struck a nerve with me. I know that she has a contract and is not the writer of the commercial. It was just written poorly if you ask me.

I know that you can't hear my tone - I'm just making an observation, no emotional meltdown attached :).

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Amie,
Great job on your progress. I had a melt down on Halloween also. I have not dropped a pound in a year. But have gone down to a 14. I was so stunned when I went to buy new pants. I pretty much eat what ever I want, but sensible. Accept for Halloween. The chocolate just sucked me in.
Today is our 28th anniversary and I am splurging. Not big, but I am going to enjoy a nice dinner.
I am having problems with stomach ulcers again, so need to get a little more focused on what is setting that off.
Anyway, Great job.:clap2:
Nancy

[Paige]

Happy Anniversary, Nancy! Hope you have a wonderful celebration :clap2:

Paige

[backtothefuture]

Thanks Paige,
We had a great dinner. Baby back ribs and a warm chocolate chip brownie covered in chocolate syrup and nuts and ice cream!! We split the meal though, so it was just enough. I did walk 45 minutes on the treadmill today.
Does anyone happen to know, if even if you walk slow, does it help. I am only up to the speed of 1.7. That is pretty hard for me with my fibro. I only burn about 45 calories in 20 minutes. I was hoping that any little bit helped.
Nancy

[Paige]

From what I've heard, any little bit does help. PBS used to run an exercising show for seniors (maybe they still do, I don't watch that much) called "Sit and Be Fit". All the exercises were/are done sitting in a chair. Even that is beneficial. Just keeping your body moving, rather than sitting, helps to keep you in better shape and your metabolism from becoming slow.

Paige

[Amie]

Nancy,

Thanks for the encouragement and letting me know that I'm not alone. I found this on walking: http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art7624.asp. Of course, like Paige said, I'm sure that every little bit helps.

Amie

[Amie]

Did you know..

That after you start loosing weight for a little while, your body tells your brain that you are starving and so actually turns up the appetite??

I found that to be very similar to holding out through the largest withdrawals for cigarettes. The cravings are tough, but they pass.

Amie

[Paige]

Amie,

Your body also tells the metabolism to slow down when you diet (in order to stave off starvation), which is why exercise is so very important to lasting results.

Paige

PS...I also wonder if training the mind can help with the cravings. As in relearning that we eat to live, not live to eat. Does that make any sense? Once I start on sugar, I just want to keep going (as you explained about the Halloween candy). If I would just not start, those cravings would lessen, I'm sure. I wish I was better about taking a pass on those things I know I don't need.

[Amie]

Your body also tells the metabolism to slow down when you diet (in order to stave off starvation), which is why exercise is so very important to lasting results.

That is true, however there must be a limit else there would be no skinny anorexics.


I also wonder if training the mind can help with the cravings. As in relearning that we eat to live, not live to eat. Does that make any sense? Once I start on sugar, I just want to keep going (as you explained about the Halloween candy). If I would just not start, those cravings would lessen, I'm sure. I wish I was better about taking a pass on those things I know I don't need.

I know intellectually that I "eat to live", but that does not override the pleasure that I experience through eating.

Exercise can be important because it actually stimulates the pleasure center in your brain in the same way that food does. One can be replaced with the other, though it takes time for exercise to be productive chemically.

It was VERY hard for me when I first began exercising because I didn't get that pleasure out of it. I just got hot, sweaty, out of breath, and sore! It took determination to keep going.

I do still exercise, though we've quit biking. I'm actually bummed about not biking though and miss it very much. Now that our streets are screwed up it's just pointless.

I still exercise by walking and doing sit up kind of stuff. After Christmas, we're joining a gym. I found one with a "family plan". I want to do some of the tae bo sort of stuff. It looks like a great workout.

As for the cravings having stopped, I'm beginning to feel that there really is such a thing as "chocoholic".

My cravings for cigarettes are gone BUT, I replaced that habit with chewing gum and I actually crave the cool from the gum going down my throat when I'm without for too long. So I still have that same craving, it's just redirected.

I don't crave chocolate unless it is in front of me. That's a lot of the time since I'm the one that gets the groceries during the week. I wonder if the cravings ever will stop.

You hear the saying "once an addict, always an addict", but then there's plenty to read about where people have "overcome addiction".

The cravings where your body thinks it's starving will stop and the appetite will return to normal. The withdrawal symptoms from physical addiction to nicotine also eventually stop.

I wonder if craving chocolate, or pleasure from habit (my gum chewing) will ever go away -- not that I want to stop my 'recovery'. It has been paying off. It isn't just my body image that this is working on.

I hope you'll let me know if passing long enough works for you. I hear that sugar can be addictive physically. Maybe that's something you can work through like nicotine withdrawals.

Amie

[jlv]

Nancy,


I did walk 45 minutes on the treadmill today. Does anyone happen to know, if even if you walk slow, does it help. I am only up to the speed of 1.7. That is pretty hard for me with my fibro. I only burn about 45 calories in 20 minutes. I was hoping that any little bit helped.

The faster you walk, the faster you burn calories, maybe. Those calorie counters on treadmills are close to worthless for measuring your actual number of calories burned.

When you walk, you lift your body with every step. When you run, your body stays at a more constant level. Those treadmills will either grossly underestimate the calories burned walking or grossly overestimate the calories you burn running.

JL

[backtothefuture]

Amie,
Thanks for the link on Walking.
Also, about the correct amount walked on the treadmill? I have noticed that when I was at the fitness center I burned a lot more calories on their treadmill. Maybe I need to go back there HA!
Had a Dr's this morning and I am up 3 pounds. First time in 2 years. I know I have been shoving a lot of crackers down, with the pain from my ulcers. But still need to get back on track. Gave away the rest of the Halloween candy. Yeah!
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

I heard that ulcers are caused by bacteria and are curable nowadays, do you know if that's right?

Amie

[backtothefuture]

That is true Amie. I don't have that virus for some reason. Probably more my IBS. I am in so much pain, I can hardly stand up. I did get some blood work back yesterday and my potassium is low, so have to go get something for that. Then the gastroentoligist called in some medicine, but I have had it before and the side effects are worse than the pain I am dealing with. I am so frustrated. Read through all my medical records that I had for when I applied for SS two years ago. I have had 9 colonoscopies since 1987!! I aught to get an award.I feel like God has really abandoned me, when it comes to my health issues. 25 years later and I am still walking around in pain asking God for help. I feel hopeless today.
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

I hope that today finds you in better spirits. I have IBS and I found something that works for me in treating it. If it begins to act up, I have at least a cup of popcorn daily. It stops it in its' tracks. I very rarely have symptoms anymore.

When I was first diagnosed, doctors saw IBS as largely a stress related issue. That was really frustrating because it leaves people (me) looking for stress where there just wasn't any. Since then, it was finally recognized as a physical issue though they haven't pinpointed what exactly the cause is. They just know that things aren't working right.

How do you see God as abandoning you? In that you weren't healed of them completely, or you don't feel emotional support - or something else?

Shalom,

Amie

[Amie]

Well,

It will be a year mid-March that I've been working on my health. I slowed down quite a bit - I think that I "plateaued". I lost about 30 pounds, but eh, then there were the holidays. I haven't worked up the courage to check the scale, but my hubby did (he put on 5 pounds).

I did do better with the chocolate, and did much better than in the past with the meals and desserts. I didn't however, do perfectly. Oh well, I'm saddling back up :).

My hubby went in on a pool at work. A group of them put in $20 dollars each for the first to loose 20 pounds (hmmm, I think 20 - I'll have to ask again). He began to run tonight and my son went with him (he looks up to his Dad :)). They have big plans - I hope that they all work out.

He (hubby) has also decided to go on "the patch" (his employer supplies them at no cost!) and to try to kick smoking again. Please pray for us all because those withdrawals affect the entire family. The patch helped me a great deal, and I haven't fallen off of the wagon yet (almost five years I think now). I hope that it works as well for him.

Last time he started working out, the weight melted off of him. I started walking with a friend a couple of months ago, for three miles per day. I also did strength stuff at home. We're stepping it up now and are going to start running too. I can't let my husband out-do me after all! haha! ;)

I'm going to get my daughter in an activity too. She is interested in cheer and karate. Both offer free trial days so we're going to do that.

Over all, the holidays went well for us. I enjoyed them immensely. I'm also glad that they only hit like that once a year.

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Hi Amie,
I was wondering if anyone would share their holiday weight or non weight gain. I also lost about 30 pounds last year and have not dropped a pound it will be a year in March also. I just can't take the thought of a 1000 calorie diet. I am ok with where I am, but 10 more pounds may help my stomach problems. I did well over the holidays and when they were over, I threw everything out, or gave it away. I enjoyed a few Christmas cookies I made, but not many.
My problem is the activity level I am at because of my Fibro. I did see this neat thing at Target that you hang over a door. Its called a door gym. It was only 13 dollars. You could do all kinds of stretching exercises with it, so I thought I may try that. I still try to walk 30 minutes a day on my treadmill. But I have to do it in two 15 minute segments.
Mostly I like to walk at what I call "the target gym". I go everyday after my bagel and grab a cart and start at the magazine end of the store and walk through the electronics all around the back of the store and back to the front. I do that twice. They probably have a poster of me hanging in the back room:biggrinbounce: Sometimes I buy something, mostly I just walk. Its indoors, doesn't cost anything and its warm, has bathrooms and you can get a soda or coffee in the food court if you want for a break!!
Cheapest gym I ever joined!!
Good luck in this year.
When my husband quit smoking 6 years ago, I thought we would all run away. So I know the withdrawals from that can be really hard on everyone. I will keep you all in my prayers:)
Maybe you can keep my husband in yours. This should probably be in the prayer section. We took him by ambulance to the hospital the day after Christmas thinking he was having a heart attack. His health is so bad. Has diabetes, high blood pressure, very over weight. I feel so much of the time, its my fault that he is in this shape because of my disability I don't cook a lot anymore. But when we do go out, He can get things like grilled chicken and such. I am not forcing those Cheeto's down his throat. My main goal for this year with the family is to eliminate all trans fats from any thing I buy. I thought that would be a small but easy thing to start with. And with eating out, it has to be broiled, grilled and not fatty also. I am also not buy the junk that temps him. I thought maybe that would help.
Good Luck
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

When it was really cold, we were doing our walking at the mall. I read that walking burns off the same amount of calories as running. Running is more beneficial in speeding up the metabolism and building muscle (unless it's long distance running - then it can actually break it down). For flat out calorie burning though, walking is less stressful on the body and its' joints.

You kept your 30 off? A 1000 calorie diet will actually quickly slow the metabolism so when you begin to eat normally, you'll put on additional weight. If you are not currently gaining weight, any drop in calorie intake will cause weight loss. Every 3500 calories cut is one pound.

Replacing just one cup of soda (about 100-150 calories) per day with water will make you loose weight and that weight will stay off.

If you weigh 200 pounds (and I was over that btw - first time I'm admitting it publically), you have to eat 2000 calories per day to maintain it. You add a zero on to your goal weight to determine how many calories per day you need to take in to maintain/reach that. If you want to weigh 150, 1500 calories per day are needed. That though, is without taking into consideration how many calories are being burned. If you eat 2000 calories per day and burn 1000, shoot, you could weigh 100 and may actually need a diet to keep weight on. I saw a show on an aspiring "strong man" (they pick up boulders and stuff for competition) and he had to eat 7000 calories per day to keep up with his training! Like my daughter's best friend would say, "that's crazy talk!" (haha)

Thanks for keeping us in your prayers, it means a great deal. I will be praying for you and yours as well. I think you're right, we oughta put this in the prayer request section too!

Amie

[Amie]

Nancy,

I started a thread under "prayer requests" called "changes". I thought that it ("changes") might apply to us both..

Amie

[Amie]

Well,

I've maintained my weight loss, but haven't lost any more yet. I stopped working out after the conference in January. I loved working out, I just don't think that I'm as motivated to work out as I am to do other things, lol! I'm setting a new date and making it publically known :). This Monday I will at least do my hour walks again.

You wanna know when I knew that I had to do something? When I had to pull a shirt out of a fat roll on my back! eeewwww!!! At least that's gone now!

Amie

[backtothefuture]

Amie,
Good job. I have put on 7 pounds this winter. I am so mad at myself. I could not walk the treadmill anymore with my knee and now I am nursing a bruised tail bone:eek: I just go from one thing to the next. We are taking the Amtrak next Saturday from Chicago to Flagstaff Arizona. I hope I can make the journey. Its a 31 hour ride. Plus I know we will be eating out all the time:D
I did manage to walk to the library today to see my daughter. So that was a good thing to do.
I do so need to get motivated again.
Nancy

[Amie]

Nancy,

Motivation - me too. I didn't walk on Monday, though I did work out Sunday night. I didn't walk this AM because it was drizzly, but I hope to work out tonight. Monday night I fell alseep on the couch. That keeps happening to me after I put the kids to bed and it's getting frustrating!

Ouch! A bruised tail bone!?! How painful!

Amie

[Amie]

This is representative of me and my husband:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=WDQgsr5tR48